Tag: Press Release

Gene Therapy for Military Personnel

Brussels, 2054.210.0900, (Wed 29 July). The Defence Commissioner’s office issued a statement today that as of 2054.244.0900, (Tue 1 Sep) all ‘critical’ military personnel will begin receiving Gene Treatment using the Mendel-7 process that was developed at the Karolinska Institute in Stockholm.

“The treatment is intended to reduce susceptibility to cosmic radiation, improve muscle tone, increase resistance to hibernation related complications and arrest aging at a physical peak equivalent to around 20 years of age,” according to Professor Dr. Diana Stolberg (58) of the Karolinska Institute. According to Stolberg, other blanket or even specific gene modifications may be added at the request of the military. She suggests things like improved reflexes and peripheral vision are being researched for pilots as well as a number of classified programs. Stolberg is an internationally celebrated, Nobel prize winning geneticist who has recently wholly been absolved of any wrongdoing around the illegal treatment of one or more ultra rich individuals in Paris in the late 2020’s.

Critics have pointed out that the long term effects of the treatment cannot yet be adequately investigated because none who have received the treatment since the first time it was succesfully applied in 2032 have lived with the modified genes long enough to draw scientifically valid conclusions. Additionally, there is the matter of military personnel not wanting to undergo the treatment on religious or conscientious grounds for which the military is currently offering no exemption.

This is an in setting press release for Total War. It is not real.

Success! The EU Finally Discovers Wormhole!

Brussels, 2051.062.0900, (3 March). The Defence Commissioner’s office issued a statement today confirming that the EU has discovered and claimed a wormhole leading out of Sol system. Further details are scarce, but there are unconfirmed reports from Chinese sources that military action was taken by the EU Navy to consolidate the claim against encroachment by the PRC.

The EU is in an uproar as after years of search and hundreds of billions of euro’s invested, the effort to find wormhole as finally achieved success. In parliament, motions have been entered to name the newly discovered system Europa though a statement by the Foreign Commissioner urged patience while the system beyond is scanned for planets in the habitable zone. This is the sixth wormhole that has been discovered leading out of the Sol system. Professor Frances Delaert of Dresden University stated that “each new wormhole discovery causes physicists and astronomers to scratch their heads harder – so many stable wormholes shouldn’t exist according to any current model of the universe.”

Despite the seeming impossibility of the discovery, Commissioners have been keen to take credit for sticking with the policy to continue funding the ESA and EU Navy efforts to find wormholes. There is a shadow over the whole affair however, as some amateur astronomers have reported what appeared to be nuclear explosions in the part of the Solar System where the wormhole is assumed to have been found.

While what exactly happened may become more clear in the coming days and weeks, it’s certain that the balance of power among humanity will shift if the EU manages to consolidate its claim.

This is an in setting press release for Total War. It is not real.